Mirror, Mirror, On the Wall….

….who’s the blindest one of all?

One day, I had lunch with my friend Nan.  In discussing a business venture, she used a word that struck fear directly into my heart.  She said that I would need to write down my (gulp) dreams.

mirror wall 072Now, friends, I’ll tell you, more than once over the years I’ve metaphorically had my teeth kicked in – sometimes through no fault of my own, sometimes completely through fault of my own.  During those times, I lost dreams.  I lost them to the extent that I just stopped dreaming.  I was too afraid to lose any more.

So, when Nan said the D word, I actually excused myself from the table for a moment.  While I was washing my hands and composing myself, I looked at my reflection.  I looked at my NON-OBESE reflection.  Wait a minute. I’m not obese anymore. For years, that was less a dream than a fantasy. Yet.  There I am. Right in the looking glass.  A reality.

Today, while I am still struggling to believe that my professional dreams will come true, I start a new road that is going to be even harder than the very difficult one I was already on. I’m having to swallow my pride to do what I have to do and, y’all, that’s hard for me.  I’m not overly proud about most things; but, those things I am proud of are very difficult for me to let go of. For at least the next three months, I’m going to have to let go of them.

To be honest, I’m angry, frustrated, disappointed and humiliated by this. However, if my dream has any hope of ever being reality, I must suck it up and get through these coming months. My dream is worth it.

So, what about you? What dream do you relegate to the corner of your mind because you’re afraid to admit to it and have it fail? C’mon. I’m pretty sure you’ve got one. How long has it been there? Take a good hard look at it. Do you really want it? Really? If you don’t and it’s more of a habit than an actual dream, let it go. While you’ll cringe at first, eventually, your spirit will feel lighter and you’ll wonder why you didn’t do it before.

If you really want it, it’s going to cost you.  You may have to eat a little crow, sacrifice a little or a lot more, and work your butt off to give it a fighting chance. So, get to it already! If you succeed, then, there you go. And, if you fail, at least you know and your thoughts and desires are based in reality.

In either case – whether you release or follow the dream, whether you succeed or fail – you win.

Now. Today. I am putting my money where my mouth is and, frankly, I feel nauseated. But, it’s time for me to want it enough to pay for it. It’s time to succeed or fail. It’s time to win.

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2 thoughts on “Mirror, Mirror, On the Wall….

  1. Oh! I love this Jon Anne! For a long, long time I left my biggest “dream” in the back recesses of my mind. Just kept discarding it as not important, impossible, too hard, too inconvenient, for others. I have been stuck because EVERYTHING in the future is dependent upon me daring to rise up and whip THIS THING! I am delighted to be down 31lbs with 81 to go. I love saying goodbye to every one of those 34.25 inches that have been condemning me, frustrating me, and holding me back for far too long. I can hardly wait to see what is right around the bend. Gonna be awesome!

    Life is just not LIFE unless we dare to dream and dare to roll up our sleeves and work for those dreams. I am so thankful that you are there for me as I overcome the limitations that *I* have set in my own life. No one else thinks it is too hard for me. No one else believes that I will fail AGAIN. No one else thinks that this is what I have to settle for. I have decided to dare to believe again. And, it is working!

    Let’s go for our dreams TOGETHER! I KNOW that *you* can do anything. I am cheering you on!! 🙂

    Hugs!
    Cindy

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