Look. I know how this works – or how it’s supposed to, anyway. I’ve seen the movie.

In Julie & Julia, Julie decides to cook her way through Julia Child’s “Mastering the Art of French Cooking.” Along the way, she starts blogging, people follow, more people follow, then Boom! She’s famous and making money on her blog. If life imitated art, I would not be clipping coupons right now.

But, it doesn’t and I am.

Silly, stupid or naive as it sounds, I really did think that something might come of this. I would send these random thoughts into the ether, someone with literary connections would read them, and suddenly I would in the middle of a five-book deal. Instead, I’m sitting in the middle of my bed wearing pink, cat pajamas surrounded by actual cats. (Hmm. Rereading that sentence gives even me a little pause.) I don’t even make pocket change for my words; so, what’s the point?

The point is that I enjoy it. While I certainly had some wild dreams of my writing leading to financial stability, I’ve accepted that, as the saying goes, I will probably be working until noon on the day of my funeral. Regardless of whether or not I ever make a dime from it, I have to write. There is something in my soul that is fed by the click of a keyboard and the blink of a cursor. And I need to write about things that matter to me. I won’t write about people with Kute names, or about the 10 things you should be eating, saving, washing, cooking or buying. We all see clickbait and we do what we are supposed to do – we click. That drives numbers, ratings and, potentially, revenue for the sites. If they list the 20 greatest gadgets we should buy right this minute from Amazon, then they make a little something-something from Amazon. There are all kinds of ways to make money on this. But, as I said, I don’t.

Don’t get me wrong. I’m not some kind of purist “suffering for their art.” Dude, if I could make some cash and still do this the way I like, I’d be all in so fast it would make your head spin! Maybe I don’t push the revenue generation because I don’t want that to be my main focus. Maybe it’s because I’m afraid that I will set it up to make money and then not make any. (How awful would that be?!) Or maybe it’s because I’m so clueless on how to do it that I don’t even know what questions to ask to get started. Whatever the reason, I just talk.

I talk about things that are happening to me, things I think about, things I think are important, and things I think might be useful to someone else, too. Like a message in a bottle, I send my thoughts out, hoping that someone finds them. When you find them, I hope that they have some value to you. I hope they are thought and conversation provoking. I hope they bring a little light on a dark day. If they do, that’s fantastic.

If they don’t, you can always find plenty of Kute make-up and shapewear tips with the next click.