Category Archives: Habits
Good behavior
Sunday Motivation
Sunday Motivation
Sunday Motivation
Making a New Habit
How long does it really take to develop a new habit? How long will it take me to stop automatically reaching for chips and reach for carrot sticks instead? I’ve seen numbers ranging from as few as 21 days to as many as 66. What that indicates to me is that it really depends on the individual involved, their motivation and how entrenched the bad habit is.
Great.
For this particular individual, it clearly takes longer than two weeks, which is how long I really lasted in Project 40. I really wish I could just download a new habit straight into my brain à la The Matrix.(Although maybe without all the cord into the base of the skull thing. Yikes!) It seems that my wishes are ahead of technology; so, I will have to do this the old-fashioned way – I’m going to have to destroy the old habit by building a new one.
Yesterday was the start and while I didn’t win every battle, I won more than I lost. I ate the cup of chocolate pudding, but I didn’t eat the pizza. I didn’t stop at a convenience store or take money for the vending machines at work – although I could still hear the Zapp’s Voodoo chips mocking me. I made better choices with my salads and roasted vegetables. Was it fun?
Um, no.
But, like our parents told us when we were growing up: not everything is fun. Sometimes, you just have to put on your big girl panties and get the job done. Other times, you have to get the job done so that you can fit back into your big girl panties!
Overall, I’ll put yesterday in the Win column since I stayed away from candy bars, chips and white bread. I ate some corn bread that I made, but I limited how much I ate.
Day One is in the books for establishing a new habit …. now, on to Day Two!
Just Call Me Duncan
I don’t mean this fictional Scottish stud … 
… or this very real hockey stud.
I mean this complete anti-stud … 
Yep. I’m a yo-yo.
I’ve allowed life circumstances – houseguests, finances, family, pet health, job stresses and relationship issues – to knock me off my game. As a result, Project 40 has become Project 45. Sigh.
You’ve been there with me, though, right? We lose 10, we gain 15. We beat ourselves up about it and gain two more. A couple of weeks ago, my sister told me that my niece could use a little pep talk. She was down on herself about having regained seven of the pounds that she’d lost. I had to confess to my sister that I wasn’t the one to give a pep talk since I’d had small bag of Chips Ahoy and four Butterfinger cups for breakfast. (I truly wish that were an exaggeration. It’s not.) I have eaten anything and everything in sight for the past few weeks.
As I’ve told you before, I’m emotional, binge eater. I’m also a compulsive eater. I can’t stand for there to be a half-finished bag or carton of something. I feel genuinely compelled to finish it…and I have the waist to prove it. I’ve had a temporary roommate who is thin and can eat anything he likes. He also can eat just a few of something and stop. I can do neither as is evidenced by the empty chocolate Donnette bag (okay, bags) in my trash can.
LoseIt! (the tracking program I use) measures a week from Monday to Sunday. I’m not waiting until Monday to get back on track – I started this morning. Yesterday, I prepared my veggies for the week and threw out all of the Frankenfoods that my roomie has enjoyed. (Sorry, Kent! You’re going to have to keep that stuff in your car or something.)
A woman, I will never be Duncan MacLeod or Duncan Keith; however, I’m taking control again so that someday soon, I will be this Duncan…
Project 40: The Zen of The Diet
It’s been a week since I started Project 40. Seven days. 168 hours. 10,080 minutes. 604,800 seconds. And in nearly every single one of those seconds, I’ve had to remind myself of why I started this project to begin with. I want to fit into my clothes again. I want to feel lean again. I want to feel strong again. And, mostly, I want to feel comfortable in my own skin again.
It has not been an easy week. Several times I would have traded one of my kidneys for a Snickers. By Thursday, my mouth felt and tasted like a sock – not that I have tremendous experience knowing what socks taste like, you understand. I just have a great imagination. You know how your mouth feels when you need something to drink? That pasty, sticky kind of feeling? Well, it was like that only with sawdust. Awful. It felt awful, tasted awful, and (I fear) smelled awful. This week I may have to keep some sugarless gum on-hand.
If you review my worksheets for the week, you’ll discover that there are times when Susie Nutrition was on point and times when she was obviously absent. Popcorn? As a meal? Well….. Obviously, it had the calories I needed for the day, but not the nutrition. I was feeling very snackish, though, and that tub of unbuttered, unsalted popcorn did the trick; so, I’m good with it. It’s not like I ate that at every meal. Most of my meals were pretty sound, actually, if not necessarily traditional.
Over the course of the week, I remembered little tricks that helped make the Great Reduction successful and many of them are zen things I saw in a meme this week:
1. Do one thing at a time. – I can’t watch tv or cruise around the internet while I’m eating. That turns eating into a mindless activity where I eat faster, I eat more, and I feel less satisfied. So, when it’s time to eat, I have to turn off the tube, turn off the laptop, and put the phone in another room.
2. Do it slowly and deliberately. – I must eat slowly. Normally, I’m done with my meal in fifteen minutes or so, which doesn’t give me time to savor anything or to let my stomach tell my brain it’s full. I slowed down this week and even put my fork down between bites a few times.
3. Do it completely. – I have to really chew my food. One of the things about eating quickly is that I don’t chew my food much, either. This week, I paid attention to that. Rather than tossing a handful of peanuts into my mouth at once on the day I had them for snack, I ate one peanut at a time, chewed it, enjoyed it, then had another.
4. Do less. – Of course, I have to eat less of the things that are bad for me, although I can still have them. Last night, I enjoyed some So Delicious Cashew Milk Dark Chocolate Truffle frozen dessert. I scooped out 1/3 a cup and savored every molecule of it. I’m not going to lie and say that it didn’t cross my mind to get more (or even the rest of the pint), of course it did! But, I didn’t do it. I have to relearn to enjoy calorie dense foods in moderation.
5. Put space between things. – I take space OUT for this one. I use smaller plates and bowls. It really does make a difference to my mind! When a smaller plate looks full, I will feel like I’ve eaten more than if I serve the same amount on a larger plate, which would look emptier.
6. Develop rituals. – I chop vegetables and store them in the fridge when I get home from the store, before I actually need them. If I keep veggies ready to use, I’m much more likely to actually use them.
7. Designate time for certain things. – I have something of a schedule when it comes to eating. This helps me ensure that my blood sugar levels stay fairly constant, which helps avoid cravings and overeating.
8. Devote time to sitting. – No more eating over the sink! I eat at the table…on a real plate…with real cutlery. I have to get back in the habit of making meals appealing to my eyes as well as to my tastebuds.
9. Smile and serve others. – Forget it. I’m eating.
10. Make cooking and cleaning become meditation. – I enjoy cooking anyway; so, this one isn’t hard at all for me. Now, making cleaning become meditation? Prolly not.
11. Think about what is necessary. – I have to plan my meals with an eye for variety so that my body gets some of all of the nutrients it needs. In addition, it’s such a temptation on a diet to opt for easy foods like salads. However, if I don’t give my body and tastebuds the variety they need, I’ll end up fighting cravings and, well, ain’t nobody got time fa that.
12. Live simply. – My menu consists mostly of things that I could grow myself or make at home if I choose. I do have some vegan cheese, some vegan cheddar crackers, and some cashew milk frozen dessert. Those are clearly processed; however, they are a minimal part of my diet. Most of my menu consists of foods that have one ingredient: themselves.
It was a good week, overall. It was challenging, for sure, but good. Project 40 is off to a good start!
Measuring Up
If you’ve looked at my Project 40 worksheets this week, you’ve noticed that there are measurements for everything I’ve eaten. Since I am counting calories, I have to measure everything. And, frankly, I’d forgotten just how tedious that is.
I mean, really. I break out the measuring cups and spoons for every little thing. That extra step isn’t all that hard; but, it’s just annoying, you know? Annoying as it is, I truly believe that it was integral to my success during the Great Reduction.
Serving sizes are crucial, particularly when you’re dealing with calorie dense items or packaged items like dry cereal or cheese. Do you know what 3/4 cup of raisin bran really looks like? I sure don’t – not without my measuring cups! Let’s say that I pour out what I think is 3/4 cup, add what I think is 1/2 cup of almond milk and scarf it up. But, let’s say that what I actually poured out was a whole cup of cereal and 3/4 cup of almond milk. In that instance, I ate 57 calories more than I thought I did. And, let’s be real, without measuring, I probably missed the mark by more than just 1/4 cup. Whether I document them or not, those calories count…..and they add up.
Pennies make dollars. Inches make miles. And ounces make pounds – whether I’m gaining or losing.
So This Happened……
When my friend Rebecca first suggested I write this blog, it was with the idea of sharing how I had lost 94 pounds and how I maintained that loss. Except that I haven’t. Maintained the loss, that is.
As I’ve told you, it all started last Fall when I got that Depro Provera shot. I started gaining weight; but, it didn’t end there. Now, here we are, eight months later. As a contraceptive, the shot worked great! I don’t have a human baby growing inside my belly; however, I’ve got a gigantic food baby growing everywhere! I see this 40-pound monster on my forearms, my thighs, my ankles and, of course, in my mid-section.
That’s right. I’ve gained 40 pounds – the weight of a full water cooler bottle. Ugh. BUT! This morning is the dawn of a new day. I decided yesterday that today would be the day I took control again. And here we are.
I have set up a new goal in my Lose It! account. This goal is to lose 1.5 pounds per week until this 40.8 pounds is gone. The app estimates that I will reach my goal by December 30th and has given me a daily calorie budget that will let me achieve this. Of course, I’ll be tracking all of my food and exercise on that site; however, if you look at the top of this page, you’ll see a new section called 2015 Project 40. Under that section, I will post my daily logs. I’ve created a spreadsheet to track my estimated calorie intake and calorie burn. You’ll be able to see at a glance what my menus are and what my workout routines are. (I’ll try to link items in the spreadsheet with items in the menu section; however, that may be beyond my technical skill. We’ll see.)
My regular posts will continue to be about food and whatever else I feel the need to talk about; so, I will likely not address that whole endeavour here often. However, the Project 40 section will always have updated sheets allowing you to track my progress and to help you with your own! If you want a copy of the spreadsheet to use for yourself, just email me at the Contact the Goddess link above and I’ll be thrilled to send one to you!
Here we go, friends!
The Quagmire of the Subjunctive Mood
When my niece was about three years old, she suddenly experienced horrific separation anxiety from my sister. The toddler would cry inconsolably saying that she “didn’t want a stepmother.” Since my sister was healthy and not thinking of divorce at that time, she was puzzled at this sudden, very real, very dramatic fear of her daughter’s. Then, one day, I was watching Cinderella with Shelby and….
Bingo!
Think about it for a minute: Cinderella’s mother dies, then, years later, her father dies. Bambi’s mother dies. Snow White’s mother dies. Aurora has parents, but they send her away for her own safety. Neither Ariel nor Belle’s mothers are ever even mentioned. Mufasa gets trampled. Yep, the happiest place on Earth makes movies where parenthood is a seriously dangerous occupation. Being a Disney parent is like being a Cartwright girlfriend on Bonanza – it’s the kiss of death, honey. The writers have already shot you or given you TB before you even show up in Virginia City. You may as well go ahead and get Hop Sing to brew you up a big, ole bowl of hemlock. You know you ain’t gonna be around for next week’s episode.
I saw the new live-action Cinderella this weekend and while I liked the movie a great deal, it reminded me of the little Shelby’s fear of what might have been. This reminded me of an interview with Phuc Tran that I heard on NPR this week. (It’s very thought provoking. If you haven’t heard it, I suggest that you do so. If you’re a grammar nerd, my suggestion is a strong one.) Tran talks about how the subjunctive mood in English allows us to consider and fret over all sorts of things that might or might not be. His parents’ Vietnamese language doesn’t have a subjunctive mood; so, his parents, aunts and uncles think only of what is or what isn’t. They don’t create worry about possibilities since their language doesn’t have the capacity for it. I had never thought about that – about language allowing us to create our own worries. Of course, it also allows for creative thinking and great progress when we imagine what might be; but, I think that it is the source of as much anxiety as creation – at least for me, it is.
What if I can’t get this weight back off? What if I can’t change my habits to include exercise? What if I never find what I’m meant to do? What if? What if? What if?
That kind of thinking has me burning up the gears on the hamster wheel in my head; but, it’s getting me nowhere. The 12-Step Programs all say to take it one day at a time. Stop borrowing trouble. But, how do I do that when I’m setting goals? Don’t I have to consider and map out the possible hurdles between me and the goal? Of course, I do. Developing a strategy to achieve my goals is the only smart thing to do. However, the problem comes in when I focus too long or too intently on the hurdles. That focus is likely to end with my mental feet getting stuck in the quicksand of the what ifs. Then I sink.
There must be a way to avoid getting stuck. Zig Ziglar says you can and successful people do it all of the time. They recognize and plan for obstacles without getting caught in the consideration of them. How do they do that?! I don’t know. I’m still working on getting the sand out of my shoes.
The Daily Doty 